The only thing I dislike more than the thought of a ghost is not knowing the future. Both are completely irrational fears/annoyances, I know, but I wish I could have just a glimpse into what I will be doing 5 years from today.
I always thought it was so much simpler to be in school – you always knew that come September, you would advance to the next grade. I was fine not knowing what I would be learning, as long as I knew the long term outline. Then came college – not knowing what college I was going to was torture. And then once I was in college – waiting to find out if I was enrolled in the only section of Biomechanics or if I would have to wait around another year was also torture. But I knew that graduation was in sight. Now graduation has come and gone and though I am in the right field, knowing how I will be using it 5 years from now would be very comforting.
During one of my trainings we were asked to come up with a short personal statement that was all encompassing for our life’s purpose. (As a side note, for some weird reason, I did not find this to be challenging – but believing and knowing it? Way hard.) Anways, I came up with “trust the process – as long as my intensions are pure, I am in the right place.” This statement could not be truer for me at any (and every) point in my life.
There are a few things that I strive for perfection on, and for some reason beyond me, making the right decisions in my life is one of them. I know there are others out there like me, who greatly fear making the wrong choice. And yet without making mistakes, we cannot advance, learning from our missteps along the way. Our faults make us who we are just as much as our successes do. So why am I so scared? I am not afraid of doing something right – in fact, I’d love for that to happen each and every time – but I know that every mistake I have made up until this point has changed me. And thank goodness for that, or I’d still be a snotty little kid who asks too many questions…
Have a wonderful and Happy Holiday =)